A Case for Self-Love

Loving yourself unapologetically is the greatest thing you can do for another.

Reread that sentence slowly. If everyone acted in soul-aligned, self-loving ways, what beauty could we create together? What happiness and harmony would ring throughout the world? Life would be magical for all. Instead, many of us seek acknowledgment or external love by bending into a pretzel of pain and misery.

Let’s debunk the myth that self-love is selfish. If supplemental oxygen is deemed necessary on a plane, step one is putting on your own oxygen mask. It’s important to make sure you’re receiving oxygen before you help others — if you’re breathing, you can help provide breath for someone else. The same is true for love — step one is self-love, filling your own cup.

Whether it’s your passion, rest, rejuvenation, alone time, nature, meditation, or something more, self-love “oxygen” is vital to your life. Connecting to this flow allows you to fill your cup and, once it’s overflowing, enables you to give to others without self-detriment.

Holding your breath while trying to help someone with their oxygen mask will lead to you passing out. While you can go through the motions of giving love, showing up, or caretaking with an empty cup, you can’t give endlessly without receiving. Whether it’s burnout, illness, or resentment, there is always a cost. The solution — self-love.

The greatest thing you can do for another is making self-love — and thereby your own happiness and joy — a priority. It allows you to show up in your grounded emotional strength, able to serve and love, with no strings attached. It allows you to love from a place of abundance, not lack. It allows you to give freely knowing it will not take a toll on your mental, emotional, or physical health. It sets you free. It sets your loved ones free. It heals all.

Self-love allows you to find love and acknowledgment from within, connecting you to your higher self and releasing the burden of impressing others or living by external standards. It provides a blueprint for effortless ease and joy in your world. It asks others to step into their own self-love power, to remove any negative cords of attachment. It’s empowering for all.

Begin your self-love journey by placing your hand on your heart and asking, “What’s the most loving thing I can do for myself today?” Be still and listen to the gentle voice within. Follow your guidance. Honor your path. Take the first step. Set yourself free!

Picture of Lo Bannerman

Lo Bannerman

Lo Bannerman is an intuitive healer, teacher, and mama on a mission to help young families foster mindfulness and nourishment from the start. After struggling in her transition to parenthood, Lo felt called to jump in and help. With a background in nutrition, lactation, and reiki therapy, she guides, nurtures, inspires, and shares an easier journey through parenthood and beyond.
Picture of Lo Bannerman

Lo Bannerman

Lo Bannerman is an intuitive healer, teacher, and mama on a mission to help young families foster mindfulness and nourishment from the start. After struggling in her transition to parenthood, Lo felt called to jump in and help. With a background in nutrition, lactation, and reiki therapy, she guides, nurtures, inspires, and shares an easier journey through parenthood and beyond.

In the know

Related Stories

The Grandma Mystique | Palmetto Bella

The Grandma Mystique

What is it? This Grandma Thing? I’d heard other women talk about how amazing it was to be a grandmother, and, when they talked about their grandchildren, they seemed completely, almost embarrassingly, smitten. I really didn’t think that would happen to me — until it did. But, how? Why? For one thing, grandmahood is the ultimate do-over. Even the best parents are only operating by trial and error, and the errors, unfortunately, have really loud voices. By the time we’re grandparents, however, we’ve garnered a bit of wisdom and perhaps some confidence as well. We see that, despite our many flaws and failures, we’ve managed to raise law-abiding citizens who

Read More »
Memorial Day | Palmetto Bella

Memorial Day

Marines in dress uniform lead the parade Senior citizens seek shelter in the shade Scouts march in step along with high school bands City officials greet the public in the reviewing stands. Just across the way among the flag-waving public stage Stands an old veteran, stooped and bearing the burden of age Suddenly he stands erect, his right hand raised in salute As Old Glory passes, he offers his valiant tribute. His left hand whisks away a tear from his eye as he recalls those to whom he never said “Goodbye.” From Flanders Field where the poppies grow To Arlington, its pristine white crosses row upon row From the flag

Read More »
Shooting Down Fear | Palmetto Bella

Shooting Down Fear

Fear of the unknown can be quite the compelling catalyst. It is easy to put a feeling on the top shelf, pushed as far back as it can go, in that out-of-the-way closet that is never opened. When it does arise, you quickly avert recognition of said feeling and wait for it to pass from your field of view. This is what the thought of holding a firearm was like for me. I was never really exposed to firearms growing up. My father hunted dove with his shotgun when I was younger. Until I moved out to go to college, the shotgun stayed zipped up in a bag, standing upright

Read More »
Whatcha Gonna Name the Baby? | Palmetto Bella

Whatcha Gonna Name the Baby?

If I had a quarter for every time I was asked this question, I could have paid for my child’s college education. Names are interesting. Southerners love to unearth the family Bible and hunt for names or find old church cemeteries and read tombstones. Charleston people like to use street names; I can make fun of Charlestonians since I am one. Meet my son Ashley Tradd Beufain Smith. Our daughter’s name will be Calhoun Vandeshorst Lockwood Ravenel. My high school bud, Dr. George Gratzick has a great suggestion for twin boys. He said to name one twin Heyward and the other Ulysses. Just yell “hey, you” when you forget which

Read More »